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Tina Dupey: My 2013 holiday wish list

In this season of fighting over the true meaning of the season, I offer my short (and admittedly incomplete) list of things which could make the world a better place all year round:

1. End the War on Christmas and end it now

What does a truce in the War on Christmas look like? How would the eight weeks we partition off to mark the historically questionable day of Christ’s birth be different? What would this season be like if saying “happy holidays” (a contraction of “holy days”) instead of merry Christmas was no longer controversial? Largely the same.

Someone somewhere is trying to kill Christmas for everyone: It’s a straw man in a synthetic Santa hat. We celebrate this season discussing a phony war on a patched together holy day headed by a composite omnipotent mythical figure. This year it got particularly creepy when Megyn Kelly of Fox News declared both Santa and Jesus to be white.

It’s an imaginary war. Declare a make-believe armistice and, really, move on.

2. Stop targeting doctors in Syria

The “civil” war in Syria has been raging for more than two years now.

The world was shocked by the images of chemical weapons being used on children in the conflict.

And according to U.N. reports more than 100 doctors have been killed and around 600 have been jailed.

Assad’s regime has effectively criminalized giving medical aid to the rebel faction.

“Government forces deliberately target medical personnel to gain military advantage by depriving the opposition and those perceived to support them of medical assistance for injuries sustained,” the investigators said.

The family of British surgeon Dr. Abbas Khan was just told this week that he died days before he was to return home after a year of incarceration in Syria.

He was imprisoned for treating patients.

3. Curb reporting conspiracy theories as valid opinions

“Evolution is just a theory,” begins the conspiracy theory about how scientists tempt people of faith by distracting them with monkeys! Death panels! “Comin’ to take our guns!” Bilderberg! Birth certificates! Obamacare! Vaccines! Conspiracy theory gets covered with the same deference as religion but with far less scrutiny. My theory: It’s a lazy way of reporting a story without actually doing any real research or investigation. Stop that.

4. 6. End affluenza

Just call it Kim Jong-un’s Disease. That’ll cure it, real quick.

Peace on Earth and goodwill to all mankind. Happy holy days.

Tina Dupuy is managing editor of Crooks and Liars. She can be reached at