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John Eggers: Kids write to God ... and get answers

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Columns Bemidji, 56619
Bemidji Pioneer
(218) 333-9819 customer support
Bemidji Minnesota P.O. Box 455 56619

Not only do kids say the darndest things, they also write the darndest things, especially to God.

I received an email containing some letters written by kids to God. How would God respond to them? I just had to give it a try.

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Question: Dear God, If we come back as someone else, please don't let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her. Denise.

Answer: Hi Denise. I know Jennifer Horton and I kind of know what you mean. Still, it's important that we try to get along with our neighbors. The next time you see Jennifer, tell her God is watching her just like I am watching you.

Q: Dear God, I am an American. What are you? Ben.

A: Hi Ben. I'm Hispanic, Norwegian, Danish, German, Ojibwe, Navajo and many more as well as an American. How would you like to know that many languages? I am who I am, Ben, and you are who you are.

Q: Dear God, I bet it's really hard trying to love everyone in the world. There are only four people in our family and I can never do it. Nan.

A: Hi Nan. It is very hard trying to love everyone, Nan. But that's what I do and I'm very good at it. As hard as it is to love your family all of the time, that's what you must do. You don't have a sister by the name of Jennifer Horton, do you?

Q: Dear God, Thank you for the baby brother but what I prayed for was a puppy. Joy.

A: Hi Joy. Puppies are one of my best and favorite creations. Puppies brings us great enjoyment but without grown ups to take care of them, they would have a tough time making it. This is why you need to take care of your baby brother so some day he can take care of a puppy.

Q: Dear God, I think about you sometimes even when I am not praying. Elliot.

A: Hi Elliot. Thank you, Elliot, for thinking of me even when you are not praying. Many people have a hard time thinking of me except when they are in church. You know I am thinking of you all the time so I guess that makes us even. Let's keep doing it.

Q: Dear God, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that OK? Neil.

A: Hi Neil. Kissing in church when two people are getting married is one of my favorite things to see. There is nothing like a kiss to show people that you really love them. Did you know what, Neil? Just between you and me, people could kiss each other more often. Yes, even in church.

Q: Dear God, In Bible times did they really talk that fancy? Lori.

A: Hi Lori. People many, many years ago talked a lot differently than they do today and people 100 or 200 years from now will talk differently than how you now talk. Things just change over time. You're right when you say that the Bible is hard to understand because people talked too fancy. Here's a secret, Lori. I made it hard to understand on purpose so you would spend more time trying to learn what I'm saying.

Q: Dear God, I think the stapler was one of your greatest inventions. Kelly.

A: Hi Kelly. I just told Joy that puppies were one of my greatest inventions but staplers rank pretty high, too. Other than people and birds and animals and fish and the stars and mountains and trees and flowers, do you know what my favorite invention is, the color crayon. Think of it, Kelly, with the color crayon you can invent anything you want to invent.

Q: Dear God, Instead of letting people die and making new ones, why don't you just keep the old ones you got now? Kim.

A: Hi Kim. I don't keep the old ones, Kim, for a very good reason. If I kept just them, then we wouldn't have new ones like you. Plus, I like to have all of those old ones close by because I miss them and they miss me.

Q: Dear God, If you watch in church on Sunday, I will show you my new shoes. Mickey D.

A: Hi Mickey D. I saw your new shoes, Mickey, and boy do they look cool. You have good taste. Remember to take them off and put on your old ones when you get home. Save them just for me.

Q: Dear God, Please send Dennis Clark to a different camp this year. Pete.

A: Hi Pete. I know Dennis Clark. He is a good friend of Jennifer Horton. Maybe you know her, too. I received a letter from Dennis just the other day. Do you know what it said? It said, "Please, God, send Pete to different camp this year." Looks like you got some work to do. I told Dennis the same thing.

Q: Dear God, put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now. Ginny.

A: Hi Ginny. Let's see, what could we put in there? How about a day or two that we dedicate to peace? Everyone in your town and state and country would do something that shows how much you hope for peace in the world. I would gladly give you my vote. Why don't you propose it and tell them that I also vote for it.

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